Articles, Poems

A Past Life….

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I paused in the clear night air to savour the moments before
death, I was lucky to know the time of the completion of this
incarnation so I was properly prepared, the icy fingers of fate
clawed inside my abdomen making me draw in the crisp air and
centre myself. When my family had been slaughtered and I had
been the only one to escape my fate had been sealed, I had
trained day and night with Sensei to be able to complete my Karma
the right way, tonight there was no win or lose…… only
completion.

Revenge powered my black heart into the next world……. I was
already dead, I could smell the sickly dying blood of this
family’s entire line just waiting for my blade to fulfil its
karma and release it from its suffering in this world…….

I no longer controlled my actions, destiny was fulfilling
itself….. I slid open the shoji and announced my presence and
my intentions, the eldest son grabbed his Katana and moved
forward unsheathing the blade at the same time…. I drew and cut
across his arms in one powerful, fluid, classic `nukitski’
movement, his eyes registered shock as he lost control of his
movements and blood spurted from the arteries in his arms, the
ice cold rage welling in my Hara powered my major cut from the
top of his head through to his lower abdomen…. releasing his
soul from this painful incarnation…..

Younger son had drawn his Katana but was looking at older son in
mortified horror…… I continued my major cut around into a
circular movement twisting my body and pulling from my Tanden to
cut him from the side of the neck through to the hip, taking his
sword carrying hand off at the wrist at the same time, he died
quickly convulsing on the floor…..

Father entered the room face contorted with hate, holding his
Katana in `Chudan Kamae’…. the `Tatami’ on the floor was now
slippery with blood and his sons intestines…… I slightly
tilted my pelvis forward, opened in the hips and knees and felt
the outer edge of my feet `root’ to the floor, I let my sword
drop loosely to my side in my right hand to `Mu Kamae’…… He
edged forward pointing the tip of the sword, the `Kissaki’, at my
throat…. then suddenly lunged with a resounding Kiai and
attempted a major cut…. but slipped on his sons intestines and
slithered helplessly onto my cross cut, I utilised the momentum
and the slippery floor to spin and remove his head as it came
forward from the cut to his middle……. he careered forward
through the shoji jetting his blood artistically over the white
screen and sending his head out into the awakening village…..

Time stood still…… three souls released into the next world
waited in anticipation…… the villagers aroused from their
sleep just stood outside knowing the final result…. there was
still wife and baby……..

I stepped over younger sons lifeless body……. his lack of
training and mental fortitude had cost him and his family dearly,
he had been the only one with the clear opportunity to kill me
and had failed because of his weakness….. I slid open the
shoji to reveal quivering Mother holding baby…… If she had
trained `Naginata’ she would have had a chance, but she too was
not adequately prepared for life or death…….

I quickly removed her head and in the same action killed the baby
before it touched the ground…….. my Karma was complete, the
family line was extinct. I wiped the blood from my Katana,
sheathed it and prepared for `Seppuku’… I felt gentle hands
remove the Katana from my grasp…… Sensei was preparing to be
my `Kaishaku’ (second)…. he passed me brush and paper, I wrote:

“My life was filled with blood and hate,yet still…”

I centred myself and felt the sharp blade against my skin…. I
powered my Ki into my final act and drove the blade into my left
side and pulled it across my abdomen following my bottom rib
along and then up into my solar plexus, I leaned forward for
decapitation……

“Why must I continually see this meditation?” I asked my `Voice
From The Deep’.

“To understand why you are here for this incarnation, what you
did there was not necessarily wrong for that time and place, but
the Karma has to be balanced this time, so your violent use of
the Martial Arts then has given you the energy to utilise them
for peace and harmony now. It is important for you to remember
the depth of feeling then to enable you to attain the depth of
balance now.”

“Does this mean that I should investigate my past lives?”

“No, reincarnation is not as you understand it, don’t waste your
life looking backwards….. everything you have done is carried
forward in your `wordless mind’….. just live true to your
feelings, if you need explicit past experiences, they will be
given to you without asking…… as you have just received.”

Only now did I understand the true meaning of `Giri’.

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