Author: Steve Rowe

Martial artist, philosopher, author, writer,
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Dying Inside

Steve Rowe

Dying insideIs a coping mechanismWhen we are made powerlessHaving the ultimate acceptanceNot wanting or needingTo end the life of the bodyWe end the life of the selfReleasing the need to controlWe yield to life and othersBeing dead none of it mattersWe’re taking our toys homeWe’re not playing anymoreWhen we can’t escape our environmentBe it poverty, politics or disablementIt’s all a kind of prisonWhen there is nothing left for the selfIt diesIs this the same as the meditating monk?The Buddha said ‘there is no self’Is it ridding us of the illusion of life?Is it losing the damaging desires?Is it good or … Continue reading Dying Inside

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The Darkness

Steve Rowe

Carrying on with life normallyAnd suddenly, without warningAn overwhelming darkness descendsEverything is wrongYou don’t want to be hereDeath is preferable to lifePeople wonder why others suddenly end their lifeIt’s because the mask slipsThe darkness is always thereDeep down, we know life is wrongWe all have Stockholm syndromeWe’re abducted into a bodyEnergy becomes desireThe thirst of wantingOr not wantingControls everythingWe spend all our timeDriven by that which cannot make us happyWealth and beauty are emptyLook at the wealthy and beautifulSee the snarl on the lipsThe emptiness in the eyesThe bullying satisfactionOr lording their wealth and empty beauty over youThey are the … Continue reading The Darkness

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My Poor Old Vehicle

Steve Rowe

My vehicle is 73 years oldThe paintwork is scarred beyond beliefThe joints are rusted, don’t work and creakThere are essential bits missingIt’s gone round the clock a few timesWouldn’t pass an MOTIn the past was driven way too hardGiven the wrong type of fuelThe driver has been a complete idiotBut it’s served wellYou have to love itSo many memoriesEvery bit of wear and tearTells a storyWould I trade it in for a new modelNot likelyWhen this one goesI’m giving up driving. Steve Rowe Continue reading My Poor Old Vehicle

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Monkey Mind

Steve Rowe

Our body’s ego and physical, mental and emotional needs can be tricky bastards. It’s like being an alcoholic or drug addict, when we’re not being mindful we revert to type. With mindfulness training we can gain insight into our faults and indoctrinations, identify them and change our behaviour to become a wiser person, but we need to be permanently vigilant or we regress. It’s like swimming upstream, if we stop swimming, we go backwards. The Buddha said that once we’ve built a house it’s important to keep the roof in good repair. The ego is a very powerful narcotic. I’ve … Continue reading Monkey Mind

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A Jewel Between My Eyes

Steve Rowe

It’s like my conscious sat back and watchedI didn’t even know it was thereDespite the the fact it’s my immortal selfMy desires made me hurt othersPhysically, mentally and emotionallyWhen I finally learned to be stillI identified what had always been thereLike a precious jewel between my eyesI found a place of refugeWhere we could observe my idiocyWhen I could objectively see myselfIt changed meWhen I realised that everything was oneIt changed meI stopped hurting others and myselfI discovered empathyStopped supporting hurting and killing by proxyStopped supporting warStopped eating animalsStopped indoctrinated tribalism and nationalismRealised that it’s not just what you doBut … Continue reading A Jewel Between My Eyes

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Amputate Or Die?

Steve Rowe

By the time most people get to the point of amputation, it’s amputate or die, up to that point if you were asked would you prefer amputation or death you probably would’ve picked death. But when reality kicks in…. When you come too after surgery a missing limb is a shock, and it’s not just that once, when you dream you have two legs or arms, so every day you wake up you get the same shock again and again. This is normal. The physical pain is bad enough, the phantom limb pains can be incredibly sharp (like cramp) and … Continue reading Amputate Or Die?

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Think For Yourself

Steve Rowe

It’s too easy to take on the views of others instead of working things out for yourself. You only have to look at your feed here on social media to see martial artists continually repeating the same old tropes that you know didn’t originate from their own critical thinking. It’s lazy, gutless and weak to only repeat the view of others so you don’t stand out from the crowd and attract criticism. Ask yourself WHY you train/study in martial arts. Ignore what everyone else has said and go deep inside of yourself to find the true reasons, is it for: … Continue reading Think For Yourself

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Ong Namo…

Steve Rowe

Ong Namo…Greeting universal consciousnessAs it fills the space in every cell in my bodyThe dark and cold of the cave behind meThe immovability of the rock surrounding meThe dawning light at the cave mouthThe steam from the awakening earth and plantsAs the morning warmth blends with the cold of nightThe earthy smell mixing with the heady perfume of awakening flowersThe profound silenceInterspersed with the calling of birdsThe trees stretching their branchesSo the leaves absorb the sunThe rough robe against my skinMorning hunger letting me know I’m aliveThe growl of ‘Ong’ from the lower abdomenVibrating the roof of my mouthOpening the … Continue reading Ong Namo…

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The Magic Of Avebury

Steve Rowe

I remember being in the Avebury stone circle and as I walked around touching each stone I felt that they were like ‘stone mirrors’, upright pieces of earth reflecting my ‘original face’ back to me. That thousands of years ago each stone belonged to a different magician and that completing the circle touching each stone gave me a unique transmission from each one and completed an ancient rite. I found Avebury far more powerful than Stonehenge and complemented the energies from Glastonbury Tor, Glastonbury Abbey (very powerful) and Chalice Well. Continue reading The Magic Of Avebury